“Perfectionism has multiple layers. It doesn’t always come from the same story, experience, or belief.” – Malorie Nicole (5:10)
Often, in the entrepreneurial world, perfectionism is a trait that is praised. We relabel the patterns with words like – self-motivated, meticulous, achievement-oriented. However, in an industry where success or failure seems to sit squarely on our shoulders, perfectionism can be a block that holds us back from the sustainable success we are meant to have in our lives.
The roots of perfectionism are unique to the individual, as are the life experiences precipitating this mindset. Both a family of origin that offered stability and structure, and a family of dysfunction, instability, and chaos can foster perfectionism.
”When we become observers of our stories, we get to decide which ones work for us and which ones to rewrite.” – Malorie Nicole (9:13)
Maybe you’re unsure if perfectionism is a pattern that influences your life. If so, read the list below. If you can identify any of these patterns in your thinking or actions, you just might struggle with perfectionism. Do you tend to think in extremes? Either you have succeeded, or you failed, second-best isn’t an option.
Do you find yourself terrified of feeling or looking like a failure? Is it difficult for you to start or complete a task because you fear it might never truly be “finished” because there will always be room for improvement? Does your level of success always feel insufficient? How is your relationship with money? Toxic relationships with money and operating from a scarcity mindset often coincide with perfectionistic patterns. Does your level of confidence always rely on quantifying your accomplishments?
“Just because it happened, perfect family or unstable chaotic environment, doesn’t mean our experience is permanent. Our lens is ever evolving” – (8:41)
If you found yourself saying yes to any of the questions above, it’s quite possible that there are patterns of perfectionism that dictate your story. Just because perfectionism has taken the spotlight in your life thus far doesn’t mean that it has to play a leading role in the rest of the story. You have the ability to rewrite your story, refocus your lens, and find freedom from perfectionism. ‘But how,’ you may ask. The first step to overcoming perfectionism is identifying where it is showing up in your life.
Become an observer of yourself and look for patterns. The more you understand yourself, and the roots of your behaviors, the more you can be empowered to shift. In moments when you feel stuck, ask yourself,
“What are two other options of how I could be looking at the potential outcomes of this situation?”
Usually, the perfectionist pattern blocks out the ability to see outside of a one-lane avenue. If you ask yourself the question, you might be surprised by the pattern-interruptions that can be created.
Step outside of your box, allow yourself to find alternative outcomes and feel the freedom that comes from facing your feet towards an alternative outcome.
Some Topics we talk about in this episode: Introduction – 0:55 How Do We Know When Perfectionism is Showing Up? – 2:08 Roots of Perfectionism – 4:23 The Polarity of Perfectionism Roots – 6:41 How to Overcome the Block of Perfectionism – 9:02 Wrap-up and Takeaways – 11:46
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